When I began writing book two of the
trilogy, Awakening, I decided I needed to ‘walk the talk’. After a bit of
googling I discovered an instructor in sword-play quite close to where we live,
so set off one Monday evening to try it out. I loved it! But was a little
dismayed to realise I needed to go home and rewrite the just completed first
three chapters.
Why?
Those darn Hollywood movies, that’s why!
All the things I thought I knew about
sword-play were learned from devotedly re-watching Lord of the Rings, The
Princess bride, and all manner of action films. For those of you basing your
descriptions on such things, here’s a couple of pointers.
sword-play were learned from devotedly re-watching Lord of the Rings, The
Princess bride, and all manner of action films. For those of you basing your
descriptions on such things, here’s a couple of pointers.
Swords don’t weigh as much as a bloody big
axe. More like a steel baseball bat (at a push). The hour long lessons didn’t
leave me with trembling arms that I could barely lift. I did occasionally
notice a little discomfort the next day, but what you’d expect from a light
work out.
axe. More like a steel baseball bat (at a push). The hour long lessons didn’t
leave me with trembling arms that I could barely lift. I did occasionally
notice a little discomfort the next day, but what you’d expect from a light
work out.
There is no pushing blades against one
another, straining with effort to push the opponent’s blade down. Why? Because
in this case the opponent allows Mr Mighty to shove, using the momentum to flip
his sword out and lodge it in Mr Mighty’s head/shoulder/neck.
another, straining with effort to push the opponent’s blade down. Why? Because
in this case the opponent allows Mr Mighty to shove, using the momentum to flip
his sword out and lodge it in Mr Mighty’s head/shoulder/neck.
Here’s five more inaccuracies shown in
movies (and books)
movies (and books)
1.
This is a broadsword
This is a broadsword
No, actually THIS is a
broadsword. That, is a long sword
broadsword. That, is a long sword
Again THIS is a long sword.
If you want to refer to a massive sword with two or one and half handle grip,
this is what you want. A long sword – not a broadsword.
If you want to refer to a massive sword with two or one and half handle grip,
this is what you want. A long sword – not a broadsword.
2.
AR = Assault rifle or Automatic
Rifle
AR = Assault rifle or Automatic
Rifle
AR actually stands for
Armalight Rifle – the company that developed it in the 1950’s.
Armalight Rifle – the company that developed it in the 1950’s.
3.
The glamourous scientist who
stuns with her looks (and skin tight pencil skirt, sky high heels and perfectly
situated blazer enhancing her bosom but cinching her waist).
The glamourous scientist who
stuns with her looks (and skin tight pencil skirt, sky high heels and perfectly
situated blazer enhancing her bosom but cinching her waist).
The chances of this, unless
the person attended university Doogie Howser style and completed their PhD by 16 giving them just four
years work experience before the ‘real world’ are very, very slim.
the person attended university Doogie Howser style and completed their PhD by 16 giving them just four
years work experience before the ‘real world’ are very, very slim.
Basically,
any scientist worth their weight is at the very least going to be middle aged.
True, this doesn’t stop them wearing the above described outfit, though sky
high heels in the lab would be rather frowned upon…
any scientist worth their weight is at the very least going to be middle aged.
True, this doesn’t stop them wearing the above described outfit, though sky
high heels in the lab would be rather frowned upon…
4.
A silencer will stop a gun
making a sound.
A silencer will stop a gun
making a sound.
No. If this is part of your
master plan, scrap it now. Silencers (known as suppressors in real life) were
designed to help reduce the amount of noise produced by some guns. But they
only do that – reduce, not silence. If you shoot a gun with a suppressor
attached, anyone within hearing distance will hear it. It just won’t be quite as loud.
master plan, scrap it now. Silencers (known as suppressors in real life) were
designed to help reduce the amount of noise produced by some guns. But they
only do that – reduce, not silence. If you shoot a gun with a suppressor
attached, anyone within hearing distance will hear it. It just won’t be quite as loud.
5.
Shooting a vehicles fuel tank
will cause it to explode in jaw dropping awesomeness.
Shooting a vehicles fuel tank
will cause it to explode in jaw dropping awesomeness.
Unfortunately no, this doesn’t
work. The mythbusters team was rather excited to try this one out. Turns out
the bullets simply travel straight through. No fire, no explosion. Boo ;p
work. The mythbusters team was rather excited to try this one out. Turns out
the bullets simply travel straight through. No fire, no explosion. Boo ;p
There’s too many more to count, do you have
a favourite? Share it in the comments!
a favourite? Share it in the comments!

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